A Grooms Guide

It’s your day too!

A few years ago I heard this little gem at a wedding I was photographing: ‘A wedding is only about two people – the bride and the bride’s mum!’

Now I’m sure that most of you will disagree! Ultimately, it’s your choice how much you want to contribute to planning your wedding, but the more you’re involved, the more the day will feel like your celebration, too.

Here are some tips for grooms:

1. Be involved in the planning, even if you only take on the things that interest you such as the transport and music.


2. Choose your groomsman wisely. A reliable friend is a better bet than a friend you may have known for years who is more focused on the free drinks. And if one of your best friends happens to be female there is no rule that says ‘boys only.’


3. Choose quality over quantity. The wedding industry is full of people who offer cut-price packages or products. Unfortunately, as in all industries, ‘cowboys’ do exist. Do your research, take advice from friends, and make your choices base on professionalism, not price.


4. Make sure you and your partner agree on the style of your wedding, then choose appropriate clothes that you feel comfortable in. three-piece suits in February may leave you too hot to enjoy the day.


5. If you wear a suit to work, then buy one for the wedding. A tailored suit will always fit better than a hired suit. It’s okay to hire suits for your groomsmen. Don’t think that you need to look the same as the groomsmen- certainly no bride in history has ever looked the same as her bridesmaids!


6. Play golf – or arrange another activity for the boys – the day before the wedding. There is simply not enough time on the morning of the wedding, as the day just flies by.


7. Hold your stag do at least a couple of weeks before the big day. Hung-over grooms minus eyebrows have never been cool.


8. Write your speech at least a week before the wedding. Winging it on the day rarely works, and often leads to important things being left out


9. Relax. If you mess up your speech it won’t ruin the wedding, or if you mess up your vows you can stop and start again. The little things that go wrong sometimes turn out to be some of the best memories.


10. And my final piece of advice – be present. This is one day of your life where you should care about the details.